Over the weekend, a friend on Facebook gave the link to an article on the home decorating site, Houzz.

It was about libraries, which I’m usually all over like white on rice, but I was set up for disappointment.

I would have liked to have read the article, but when a site builds a “paywall” that forces me to sign in with Facebook or my email in order to view the shared content, I’m gone.

Give Us Your Soul

They should have a better system in place to track views and get opt-ins. And if you want my email address, don’t force me to give it to you.

Many websites — newspapers in particular — have instituted a “paywall.” Either you have a limited amount of articles you can read per month or you aren’t allowed to read further than the home page if you’re not a subscriber.

I understand that newspapers are trying to stay financially afloat. They’re fighting the mindset that “information wants to be free.” The ad model that worked for print newspapers isn’t translating well online.

Banner ads aren’t working, at least not as well as they did before. New software is allowing the user to completely block these ads, both on their desktop and now for mobile devices. There is much hand-wringing about this development but the answer is clear: consumers want to be contacted by businesses in a different way.

We’ve gone from “interruption marketing” (radio and TV ads that would “interrupt” whatever you were doing and force you to listen to them) to “permission-based marketing,” where a company asks for your permission to send you emails and other promotional material. This is fine and dandy with most buyers.

But paywalls? They suck and it’s a lazy, desperate way to market. I felt like Houzz was the overly-demanding bouncer, blocking access to a cool party. Expecting me to “sign in” with my Facebook account or give them my email address in order to enter their site was, in my opinion, asking too much, too soon.

Give Me a Reason to Give You My Soul

When I say “lazy,” I mean that these businesses are trying to use the content they’ve always created as an “extra” for people to sign up to read. The content hasn’t changed. It was the same content people paid a newspaper a subscription price to receive all the time. It often is the same content that was available for a website visitor to freely view. Before someone got the idea to erect a paywall.

So even if it was purchased as a regular subscription, it usually isn’t compelling enough to get a new subscriber onboard. The content MUST change. It has to be different. Not something I could just click on the Associated Press site to read.

I have a theory about opt-ins and requests to subscribe to anything. It’s like a dating relationship. Let me get the chance to know you before we start exchanging apartment keys.

It takes time for a buyer to become acquainted with you. They may explore your website and read some content. Then they might go away only to come back to visit when a friend shares something interesting from your site. It may take a person visiting a few times before deciding they want to hear from you on a more regular basis.

So what’s the answer? I have a suggestion.

You Need to Help Me, Then I’ll Help You

I believe that for these types of websites to survive, they are going to have to move to a premium membership site that actually gives VALUE. I pay Netflix $7.99 a month for streaming video and get a bunch of value out of it. Even though they may not have enough new releases, there are plenty of other movies that my husband and I have been able to enjoy.

I pay a monthly premium membership for other sites, too. Why? Because there is information I want that I can’t get any other way.

If a media company started to make almost everything free EXCEPT those types of “premium” stories that they know would interest people — I think they’d have a better chance of getting people to subscribe. And go after their audience in a more positive way.

Instead of saying, “You’ve reached your limit of 6 free articles per month” (which makes a reader feel like they took too many cookies from the cookie jar and getting their hand slapped for it), create the kind of content that will really engage people and help them.

Have a series of videos, for instance, that could help people save money. Or live a healthier life. Or succeed as an entrepreneur.

These would be really well-done videos that would communicate a clear, actionable message. Add some entertainment to it. Be unique. Be interesting.

A key component to this would also be engagement from the content provider. If I see people talking about your site a lot, if I keep seeing your name pop up on Twitter or Facebook, I start to notice you more.

That to me would be a much more compelling than “You have to pay to play, sucka!” Don’t lecture me. Engage me.

The way we consume information is different. Forcing people to give you their email address might work because a person is curious about an article. But in the long run, people who are forced into a relationship rarely stick around.